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Published August 21, 2012, 11:45 PM

Ryan Bakken: Birth control pill for men hard to swallow

GRAND FORKS - A contraceptive pill for males is on the horizon. This news likely will be cheered wildly by women, who overwhelmingly have carried the birth control burden over the years.
Not so fast, ladies.

By: Ryan Bakken, Forum Communications, INFORUM

GRAND FORKS - A contraceptive pill for males is on the horizon.

This news likely will be cheered wildly by women, who overwhelmingly have carried the birth control burden over the years.

Not so fast, ladies.

Think about it. Do you really want to trust such an important duty to a male?

Most of us can’t remember our wedding anniversary or to put down the toilet seat. So how can you expect us to be responsible enough to remember to take a daily pill?

If this pill ever goes on the market, I’m not investing in it. On the contrary, I’m putting my money into Gerber, Fisher-Price and Gymboree.

As a commercial venture, it will have the success of New Coke.

That’s because men are too unreliable to take on such a responsibility.

Plus, there would be a fear that this pill would threaten their masculinity and virility. They would fear that taking such a pill would turn their baritone into a soprano. Of, even worse, they’d develop the urge to watch “Dancing with the Stars.”

This reasoning isn’t rational. But men are very sensitive when it comes to their masculinity. Starting at a young age, males eschew wearing pink.

Scientific explanation

Here’s your science lesson on the male contraceptive pill:

A compound initially ticketed for blocking cancer has been found to reduce both the number and quality of sperm generation in mice, essentially leaving them infertile. It has been found to inhibit proteins called bromodomains, one of which plays a key role in generating sperm.

What’s a bromodomain, you ask? Following is its definition:

“A bromodomain is a protein that recognizes acetylated lysine residues such as those on the N-terminal tails of histones. This recognition is often a prerequisite for protein-histone association and chromatin remodeling. The domain itself adopts an all-a protein fold, a bundle of four alpha helices.”

There, that should allay men’s fears.

Plus, it’s sure to be less painful than a vasectomy.

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