Parenting Perspectives: A glimpse at why holidays aren’t relaxing

Parents, consider this your permission to go get a massage.

With the holidays pounding on your door, you are officially busier this month than any other. In an effort to celebrate how amazing you really are, I’ve written down a glimpse of “the busy life of a parent” for the month of December.

If your non-parent friends cannot possibly understand what you are so busy with, share it with them.

• Get excited about Christmas.

• Put up the Christmas tree and décor.

• Make a grocery list.

• Zip grocery list snugly into my wallet – thus never to be lost.

• Make a to-do list.

• Make a what-else-not-to-forget list.

• Cross off “Make to-do list” just so you have something to cross off your list. Go you!

• Leave the house, and pray you make it on time.

• Vow to get the Christmas cards out early this year.

• Sign up for that potluck.

• Learn about the Elf on the Shelf.

• Determine if I have time to move said Elf.

• Pay bills.

• Due to the bills, decline the seventh home shopping party invitation of the month.

• Write a really convincing argument on the Facebook party wall explaining why you cannot possibly attend. Please don’t be insulted; it’s just not realistic for me.

• Go to early holiday party for your child’s school/therapy/special needs group.

• Dream of taking a bath.

• Call the insurance company.

• Call the insurance company again, because today the individual that can help you is in the office.

• Buy a day care provider gift.

• Look for your grocery list, I KNOW I put it in here.

• Curse because you forgot the three coupons that are for the items you actually planned to purchase .

• Seriously consider if shopping is really necessary.

• Continue grocery shopping, give in to multiple purchases that your toddler magically added to the list.

• Let your toddler ride the horse for a penny.

• Convince your toddler they don’t really have to go to the bathroom while toting a cart full of groceries that you just had to bag yourself.

• Get fast food because now you have no time to cook.

• Promise yourself a new workout plan will be set in action tomorrow.

• Let your child have Cheetos in the car so you don’t have to hear them whine for 20 minutes – It’s worth it. I’ll clean it later.

• Find something for us all to wear for holiday pictures.

• Tend to a suddenly sick child.

• Go to the store for medicine, no matter what it costs. If it will bring health back, I will buy it.

• Reschedule holiday pictures.

• Think – I should really Christmas shop.

• Call to schedule a doctor’s appointment, Yes, I know he was supposed to come last month. I dropped the ball.

• Buy school teacher gift. At this point, it’s hard to care if they even like it.

• Get sidetracked momentarily.

• Get coffee to rid of the sidetracking that must end immediately.

• Grocery shop. Wasn’t I JUST here?

• Scholastic book order is due.

• Open the mail to reveal a new bill you weren’t expecting this month.

• Remember birthdays also occur in the month of December.

• Look for previously mentioned to-do list.

• Drive across town for your child’s orthotic adjustment.

• Pay bills.

• Think, “Where did the past 5 years go when my child was an infant?”

• Understand why no one ever wants to host.

• Buy egg nog, officially consider myself “festive.”

• Fill up with gas, wish you could go in for a snack, but that would mean lugging my child in too, and conclude it’s not worth it.

• Everyone’s in bed, watch “Mike & Molly” – I need to laugh, and they make me feel skinny.

• Sleep in a little bit, blame the alarm.

• Your single friends plan a vacation to Napa Valley – it PAINS you, but you regretfully decline.

• Continue with your life as a mom, while your heart just flew with your friends to Napa Valley.

• Respond to child’s therapy emails and pray you can actually help with those goals.

• Stuff, stamp and mail the Christmas cards.

• The month is over and it’s time for Christmas.

• The shopping, wrapping, cooking, negotiating, convincing and whining is over.

• You did it!

• Let Santa take all the credit.

Kerri Kava is The Learning Forum coordinator for The Forum. She can be reached at kkava@forumcomm.com .

Tags: kerri kava, shesays, columns, family, lifestyles