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10 Commandments of 'Joan of Arcadia'

The following is taken from the CBS show in which a teenage girl (above) talks to God. 1. God cannot directly intervene. 2. Good and evil exist. 3. God can never identify one religion as being right. 4. The job of every human being is to fulfill ...

The following is taken from the CBS show in which a teenage girl (above) talks to God.

1. God cannot directly intervene.

2. Good and evil exist.

3. God can never identify one religion as being right.

4. The job of every human being is to fulfill his or her true nature.

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5. Everyone is allowed to say no to God, including Joan.

6. God is not bound by time -- this is a human concept.

7. God is not a person and does not possess a human personality.

8. God talks to everyone all the time in different ways.

9. God's plan is what is good for us, not what is good for Him.

10. God's purpose for talking to Joan, and to everyone, is to get her (us) to recognize the interconnectedness of all things, i.e. all of your actions have consequences; God can be found in the smallest actions; God expects us to learn and grow from all our experiences. However, the exact nature of God is a mystery, and the mystery can never be solved.

Source: The Associated Press

Dubious movie blurbs

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Esquire, in its December edition, honors the Top 5 most dubious movie blurbs of 2003. Below is the blurb followed by the mag's snarky comment.

No. 5: "A rare romantic comedy that works for men as well as women" -- by Jim O'Brien, Cleveland's News Channel 5, on "How to Lose A Guy in 10 Days"

Snarky: As long as the men are gay.

No. 4: "One of the Most Outrageously Funny Movies in Decades" -- Marc Warren, The Baltimore Afro-American, on "Malibu's Most Wanted"

Snarky: Which decade exactly?

No. 3: "Stunning, inspired and inspiring, 'Gods and Generals' is the finest Civil War movie ever made -- including 'Gone With the Wind.' " -- Jim Svejda, CBS Radio

Snarky: Also, "Windtalkers" is much better than that "Casablanca."

No. 2: "This Planet Is A Treasure." -- Richard Corliss, Time, on "Treasure Planet"

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Snarky: We're not sure he saw the movie, but he definitely saw the title.

No. 1: "I haven't laughed harder at anything this year." -- Lou Lumenick, New York Post, on "The Hot Chick"

Snarky: We've haven't laughed harder at any blurb this year.

To contact The Rail, send an e-mail to features editor Dean Rhodes at drhodes@forumcomm.com and he'll forward it, or click on the Valley R&R icon at In-Forum.com

Today's best bet

"Sleeping Beauty," 2 and 7 p.m., children's theater adaptation of classic fairy tale.

Roland Dille Center for the Arts, Hansen Theatre, MSUM campus, Moorhead

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