10. Orange: when it's really bad, but still not really, really bad. Oh wait, they actually did that one.
9. Autumn Maple Leaf Reddish-Orangish: when the nation is threatened by Canada. It may be closer than you think.
8. Grey with Blinky Lights: when the nation is threatened by an alien invasion.
7. Textbook Black and White: when George W. Bush has a bad dream about being attacked by third-grade spelling bee champions using a magic and evil weapon they call "Literacy."
6. Pea Soup Green: when the Loch Ness monster finally leaves Scotland and makes its way to the pool in front of the Washington Monument.
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5. Purple and Gold: when the Vikings actually win a football game ... something must be wrong.
4. Antique White: when Congress approves a long-standing motion to mandate the wearing of poofy white wigs.
3. Banana Yellow: when suspicions are confirmed that President Bush has been kidnapped and replaced by a monkey.
2. Neon Banana Yellow: when suspicions are confirmed that President Bush is a monkey.
1. Rainbow: when angered Sesame Street characters plunder and pillage the White House because Bush "makes
us sad."
Lee Richards, senior
