Programming for GoreTV

Programming for GoreTV

The Rail loves it when a premise is handed to it on the proverbial silver platter.

Last week it was reported that former Vice President Al Gore was meeting with potential investors interested in creating a cable television network, one that would counter dominant conservative voices.

Basically, liberal TV.

So The Rail and its cohorts compiled a suggested list of liberal shows one might find on GoreTV.

Shows include:

E "Survivor: The Florida (Election) Swamp."

E "Gilmore Young Feminists."

E "The Left Wing."

E "Joe (Heavily Taxed) Millionaire."

E "Whose Presidency Is It, Anyway?"

E "CSI: Conservative Scandal Investigation."

E "All in the First Family."

E "This Old House and Senate."

E "America's Funniest Legislative Videos."

E "Everybody Loves Al."

E "Will and Disgrace."

E "Trading Votes."

E "Behind the Offensive Music (With Tipper Gore)."

E "SpongeBob SquareDole."

E "King of the Capitol Hill."

E "Bushy the Economy Slayer."

E "Eight Simple Rules for Running My Country."

E "Miami Vice President."

E "Elimicandidate."

A slow night

in Perham

The following police log item, which appeared in the June 19 Perham (Minn.) Enterprise Bulletin, was brought to The Rail's attention. It was too funny not to pass on.

"9:30 p.m.: A reserve officer, walking into an alley downtown near a local bar, discovered three women engaged in a urination contest. Apparently, height on the wall was the method for determining a winner. The women were told to stop by the officer and left the scene."

New Witch magazine gives computer advice

Some people think that computers are the work of the devil, so it's no surprise that New Witch magazine has tips for how witches should deal with their Dells, HPs and Apples.

Galina Krasskova cautions witches to turn off their computers while doing spellwork because it can cause an energy overload. (Haven't they heard of hex protectors?)

In addition, because vaettir, which are "nature spirits," can take up residence in a hard drive, she suggests shaking a coffee can full of coins around the computer to drive them out.

To contact The Rail, send an e-mail to features editor Dean Rhodes at drhodes@forumcomm.com or click on the Valley R&R icon at In-Forum.com.

Today's best bet

Summer Cinema 2003, 7:30 p.m., presents 1935 film "Les Miserables," starring Fredric March.

Weld Hall, MSUM

campus