By its latest estimates, the country's most popular social-networking Web site - myspace.com - has more than 100 million profiles. That's more than one-third the population of the U.S.
They might be on to something there.
Soon, even people 30 and older might get in on the act - maybe even some local notables.
But we beat them to the punch.
Here's what the profiles might look like for Fargo Mayor Dennis Walaker, former Clay County Attorney, now 7th District Judge Lisa Borgen
ADVERTISEMENT
and North Dakota State University's head football coach, Craig Bohl.
Just in case you missed the implication, here's the explicit warning: These are fake profiles, intended as satire only.
Dennis "DENNY" Walaker
About me:
If you live in Fargo and don't know my name, that's OK. I only SAVED YOUR CITY! Now I'm your mayor. No connection.
I'd like to meet:
The man who saved this town from the 1997 flood. Oh wait. That's me.
Denny's facts
ADVERTISEMENT
Quote: "Let my people stay dry!"
Gender: Male
Age: 65
Location: Fargo
E-mail: mosesoffargo@cableone.net
Interests: Grandfathering and dike-building
Music: "Five Feet High and Rising," by Johnny Cash. Great tune. It's about a flood, you know.
Movies: "The 10 Commandments." You know what scene I'm talking about.
ADVERTISEMENT
Television: Cable-access replays of commission meetings (that's me in the middle!).
Books: "How to Win an Election without Even Trying," a recently discovered treatise by George Washington.
Heroes: Noah. From the bible. With the arc. Because of the flood.
Denny's Details
Groups: NDSU Team Makers
Status: Married
Orientation: Straight
Smoke/drink: Not for 30 years/only in Tuscany
Children: Yes
Education: High school
Occupation: Mayor
Lisa "L-BO" Borgen
About me:
I'm just the girl-next-door type. You know,
typical stuff - a nurse who became a department store manager before moving on to be a prosecutor and a judge. Same old, same old.
I'd like to meet:
The truth. But I hope when I do, it doesn't hit me in the face.
Lisa's facts
Quote: "You wouldn't know the truth if it hit you in the face."
Gender: Female
Age: 44
Location: Moorhead
E-mail: judgeandjury@aclu.org
Interests: Felony charges. Always loved 'em.
Always will.
Music: Anything with a strong gavel beat.
Movies: "101 Dalmations" and "Dead Man Walking"
Television: "Law and Order," "What Not to Wear" and anything on CourtTV.
Heroes: Rudy Giuliani
Groups: Minnesota Bar Association
"COACH" Craig Bohl
About me:
I'd love to tell you about my personal life. That doesn't mean I will, though.
I'd like to meet:
Athletic directors from Division I-A universities
Craig's facts
Gender: Male
Interests: Football, football coaching and mountain climbing
Music: That heavy-metal stuff they play at the Fargodome before games
Movies: "Remember the Titans," "Rudy," "Jerry Maguire" and "Friday Night Lights"
Television: NDSU vs. Montana game
Books: NDSU playbook (offense), NDSU playbook (defense)
Heroes: Unbeaten football coaches
Groups: FOCURS (Football Coaches with Unbeaten Records Society)
Craig's details
Orientation: Unknown
Smoke/drink: Unknown
Education: Unknown
Readers can reach Forum reporter Dave Roepke at (701) 241-5535