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Time to get out the skull and crossbones

Time to get out the skull and crossbones Avast, ye readers of The Rail, today's column has been boarded by pirates in honor of Talk Like A Pirate Day. From the scurvy likes of Johnny Depp in "Pirates of the Caribbean" to that bilge rat of a carto...

Time to get out the skull and crossbones

Avast, ye readers of The Rail, today's column has been boarded by pirates in honor of Talk Like A Pirate Day.

From the scurvy likes of Johnny Depp in "Pirates of the Caribbean" to that bilge rat of a cartoon character, SpongeBob SquarePants, bein' a pirate is more popular than walkin' the plank.

In honor of Talk Like A Pirate Day, The Rail presents the following trivial booty:

- Talk Like A Pirate Day is the idea of John Baur and Mark Summers, who created the day in June 1995, choosing Sept. 19 -- Mark's ex-wife's birthday -- as the only date he could recall that wasn't taken up with something like Christmas or the Super Bowl.

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The two men celebrated the day pretty much by themselves until Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist Dave Barry wrote about them.

Pirate lingo basics

- Ahoy! -- "Hello."

- Avast! -- "Stop and give attention." It can be used in a sense of surprise.

- Aye! -- "Why yes, I agree most heartily with everything you just said or did."

- Arrr! -- Often confused with "arrgh," which, of course, is the sound you make when you sit on a belaying pin. "Arrr" can mean "Yes," "I agree," "I'm happy," "I'm enjoying this beer," "My team is going to win," etc.

- Beauty -- The best possible pirate address for a woman.

- Bilge rat -- The bilge is the lowest level of the ship. A bilge rat, then, is a rat that lives in the worst place on the ship.

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- Grog -- An alcoholic drink.

- Lubber -- Seaman's version of land lover.

- Smartly -- Do something quickly.

Pirate phrases

"This relationship is over. It's me, not you. I'm sorry, but I need some space right now."

"Avast ye' daft son of a biscuit eater, tis time for ye to walk yonder plank. This old scow not be fit for the likes of you."

"Dude, where's my

stapler?"

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"Aye! If I find me stapler in your berth, you scurvy knave, ye'll be hangin' from the yard arm this noon!"

"We will find the person responsible and take appropriate corrective action."

"Aye, we'll deliver the black spot to the scurvy bilge rat behind this evil misdeed!"

Pirate monikers

- Old Salty Dog

- Lusty Wench

- Captain Cook

- Peg Boy Tom

- Pistol Pete

- One Eye Dick

- Poopdeck Joe

Source: Talklikeapirateday.com.

To contact The swachbucklin' Rail, send an e-mail to the scurvy dog features editor Dean Rhodes at drhodes@forumcomm.com , or click on the Valley R&R icon at In-Forum.com

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