Wake up everyone, for spring is nearly here. Be reborn from hibernation into the celebration that is thawed supermarket parking lots adorned with the soggy colors of revealed paper garbage. Welcome the melting of the snow as it showcases all the dog droppings that owners neglected to scoop up and the wonderful smells accompanying them.
Prepare to bask in the sheer awe of how schizophrenic North Dakotan weather is by lifetime residents who have seen it occur for decades. Geez, Louise! It was raining yesterday, snowing three days before that, and tomorrow it's supposed to be warm and sunny! Indeed, Margaret. Indeed, it is again March.
Revel in excitement the fourth time you hear someone recite the idiom, "In like a lion, out like a lamb."
Brace yourself for the person wearing shorts any time the temperature is above 30 degrees. Wow! Can you believe him? This is definitely a conversation starter!
Embrace the strange new grimes and sludges that cake your vehicle's tires, accumulating as stalactites of black plaque from the wheel wells. There is much joy to be had in intending to kick through one of these only to discover that the mass is much more solid than anticipated. What are you? Of what do you consist?
Start gathering your worn furniture and broken appliances and ready them to be thrown to the curb in May for 40-year-old men with rented trailers to rifle through. This is certainly a North of Normal tradition, eh?
Relish the newfound energy and motivation given to us by our beautiful sun's light throughout the days that grow in length before returning to your usual routines and standard operating laziness levels by mid-April.
And lastly, enjoy the temporary political armistice and shared appreciation for the weather while you can, for it will not be long before someone begins screaming about cyclists and it inevitably devolves into a somehow liberal versus conservative argument. Have a great day.
Nerpel lives in Fargo.