Unable to sleep last night while restlessly awaiting a resolution to the spitting match between Gomer Does Big-City Radio and The Thin-Skinned Hockey Coach, your favorite answer man, Mr. Know It All, replied to some e-mails.
Dear Mr. Know It All,
I know Myron Allen violated a couple of NCAA rules. But don't you think he deserves a chance to continue his basketball career so he can stay in school and get his education at the University of North Dakota?
After exhaustive research, Mr. Know It All has stumbled upon this revelation: People do not need to play sports in order to be college students. With this discovery, Mr. Know It All is certain that if UND's appeal to the NCAA on Allen's behalf falls short, Sioux coaches, administrators and boosters will do everything in their power to assure Myron remains in school -- and that includes helping him find a way to pay for it.
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Dear Mr. Know It All,
Besides being your newspaper's resident jerk sports columnist, I see that you also write about the outdoors. Do you agree that nonresident hunters are the greatest threat to North Dakota's proud hunting heritage?
Since he has started following outdoors issues more closely, Mr. Know It All has been amused by sportsmen on both sides of the Red River. In North Dakota, a significant portion of them are worried nonresidents are a threat to hunting.
In Minnesota, the many disparate sportsmen's groups in that state are wringing their hands over who the next DNR commissioner is going to be -- mostly out of self-interest.
In the meantime, the Bush Administration is attempting to gut the Clean Water Act to appease business interests. The administration wants to remove protection from one-third of the country's remaining wetlands so they can be drained, plowed under and paved over in the name of development.
In a nation that already has destroyed 50 percent of its wetlands (which produce ducks, geese and other game critters), this should be considered almost criminal by the nation's sportsmen.
The greatest threat to hunting -- in any state -- is dwindling habitat. Bush's plan would greatly accelerate that process. But sportsmen in North Dakota and Minnesota are seemingly turning a blind eye to the big picture to focus on the smaller ones.
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Dear Mr. Know It All,
I see the Minnesota Vikings coach changed defensive coordinators. What do you make of this move?
It proves that some things in the Vikings organization never change. Assistant coaches continue to bear the brunt of the team's failures.
On the day Mike Tice announced George O'Leary would replace Willie Shaw as d-coordinator, O'Leary offered this comment:
"We're probably shy some players right now. We need more quality depth and some quality starters. It's obvious there are some positions that need to be upgraded if we want to get where we want."
Summary: The Vikings didn't have good enough players to stop other teams.
And this was Shaw's fault? Mr. Know It All wonders when the guillotine will be wheeled into the team's personnel department instead of its coaching offices.
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Dear Mr. Know It All,
It sure looks like North Dakota State will join the Big Sky Conference. Which Bison sport will benefit the most and which will suffer the most from this move?
The sport benefiting the most is easy: men's basketball. The carrot of qualifying for the Big Dance will always be there. The carrot of going to a Big Ten or Big 12 school for a non-conference shellacking will always be there. Mr. Know It All has always believed Fargo-Moorhead is a basketball town in the winter and a competitive, entertaining men's team at NDSU could own the burg. The pressure will be on Tim Miles to produce -- and quickly.
The sport to suffer the most will be difficult for some to swallow: women's basketball. Fargo has always supported Amy Ruley's club, but the program will face challenges in the Big Sky. Men's and women's teams have different schedules, meaning fans will have to pick and choose which games to attend. That will hurt the women. Media coverage -- currently second to none in Division II -- likely will lessen for the same reason. And the lure of the NCAA tournament or a non-conference game against a major-conference foe just isn't the same in women's basketball.
Unless Ruley can win and win big right away, the Bison women's program might find itself doing something it hasn't done for a long while -- taking a backseat.
Readers can reach Mike McFeely at (701) 241-5580 or mmcfeely@forumcomm.com
